Christmas Woes
by NonexistentBeing
Summary: It's Christmas Eve, and Star is coming to realize why she gets a sick feeling every time she sees Jackie and Marco together. Set after "Bon Bon the Birthday Clown."
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I'll confess, I love sad Star. And I also love Starco. So here you go. Let me know if I should make this a chapter story.**

Christmas time.

The holiday season had snuck up on Star Butterfly. Normally, she would have been super-duper excited to celebrate her first Christmas with the Diaz family (her first Christmas ever, actually, since Mewni had its own holidays) but she couldn't find the energy to be as cheerful as she normally would have been.

Maybe it had something to do with losing Glossaryck. Or maybe it was her mother's disappointment at hearing about the lost spellbook.

But as Star trudged downstairs the morning before Christmas to the smell of Mr. and Mrs. Diaz cooking breakfast with laser puppies at their heels, she felt it could also be the strange feeling that threatened to shrivel her stomach into poisoned sludge.

"Where's Marco?" she chirped with forced joy, already knowing the answer.

"Merry Christmas, Star!" Mr. Diaz replied, flipping a pancake with a spatula. "Marco left a while ago to give Jackie a present!"

"That girl is so perfect for our boy," Mrs. Diaz cooed. The two of them giggled. They weren't paying enough attention to notice Star's hurt expression.

"That's… that's great!" the blonde princess finally managed. The adults nodded, too happy to notice her discomfort. "Well, I'll be in my room… till he comes back…"

Mrs. Diaz turned from her husband. "Star, don't you want breakfast – ?"

But the girl was already gone.

Star buried herself under the covers of her bed, trying to sort out her feelings. Yes, there was the pain of losing Glossaryck, but that hardly compared to the loneliness she was feeling.

But she'd felt lonely before. Rarely, but still. This was more than that.

She couldn't explain this feeling, nor did she know what to do about it. It was sharp and deep in her chest, and it wouldn't go away. She couldn't explain the anguish she felt at hearing Marco say Jackie Lynn Thomas's name with adoration, or the urge to scream that came upon her when Marco was anywhere near his girlfriend. It was an entirely new emotion to her, and she didn't have a clue what to do about it.

Logically, she knew she couldn't be mad at either of them. Jackie was really sweet, and Marco was absolutely adorable –

She cut off her own thought reflexively, then wondered why. She'd thought those things before, hadn't she? Marco Diaz was her best friend! Of course she thought he was adorable, and of course she loved him!

Oh.

Instantly, her stomach curdled even more. No. She wanted him to be happy. And he was happy with Jackie. Why couldn't she be happy about that?

You know why, a traitorous voice in her head whispered.

Star buried farther into her covers. Maybe she did know. Maybe it was suddenly making a lot more sense as to why she was feeling this way. But that didn't make it any easier.

At that moment, the door downstairs shut, and footsteps padded slowly up the stairs.

"Star! Star, it's Christmas Eve! Why didn't you have breakfast yet?"

Marco was back. He poked his head in from behind the door with a kind smile.

He wasn't really surprised that Star hadn't gone down for breakfast. She'd had less of an appetite since losing Glossaryck. But he'd at least expected her to regain some of her pep for Christmas.

Star didn't move from underneath her mountain of covers. She couldn't talk to him, especially not now that she knew what was bothering her.

"Star?" Marco tried again, walking over to her and sitting on the edge of the bed. "Are you okay?"

Star almost laughed into hysterics. What gave him that impression? But she only curled farther into her covers.

"Are you worried about Glossaryck?" Marco asked softly. It wasn't often, but he would occasionally catch her in moods such as this. Each time, she used the same excuse. This time, she decided, would be no different.

"Y-yeah," she mumbled. "He would have liked Christmas…"

Marco leaned over her, embracing her in her fluffy cocoon. Star tensed, immediately thinking of Jackie. Hugging, which had once felt so natural, was now a reminder not to get in the way of their relationship.

"Um, let's go downstairs," she said quickly. "I think I'm ready to eat some yummy pancakes now! Okay? Come on!"

She extracted herself from her blankets and bolted out of the room, leaving Marco feeling very concerned. There was a certain tone in his friend's voice whenever she was faking her normal attitude, and he detected it now. The problem was, he didn't know why. Maybe she just didn't want to trouble him. He was her friend, and he was always there for her, but if she didn't want to talk, he wouldn't make her.

"Wait up!" he called, racing after her, only to find that she had stopped short, staring at the kitchen down the stairs.

"Hey, Star," said Jackie Lynn Thomas, raising a hand from where she was eating her pancakes.

Star stood, frozen. Marco smiled at Jackie, not noticing, but Jackie tilted her head at her in amused confusion.

Star snapped herself out of it and said, trying to look casual, "Hi, Jackie. I didn't know you were here!"

"Yeah. Marco invited me. I'm not gonna be around tomorrow with celebrating and all, so I'm hanging around here today." She smiled.

Marco hopped down the steps to his girlfriend's side, taking her hand and leaving Star with an overwhelming sense of loss. "Do you like the pancakes?" he asked eagerly, albeit nervously.

"Like them? I love them." Jackie turned to his parents. "Thanks, Mr. and Mrs. Diaz."

None of them saw the heartbreakingly anguished expression on Star's face.

"You are very welcome, Jackie!" Mr. Diaz said proudly. "They are made with our secret ingredient!"

Jackie chuckled, and Marco turned to Star, who was still standing on the staircase. "Star, you should try them! I promise, they're almost as good as my nachos!" he said, trying to cheer her up from earlier.

Star blinked back the wetness in her eyes and pasted on a smile.

"Thanks! But I'm not so hungry. Maybe later!"

Marco frowned at her forced behavior, but it was soon forgotten as he and Jackie ate their pancakes with his parents making ridiculous conversation that made them almost choke on their food.

A single teardrop slid down the heart on Star's cheek.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So this chapter was insanely difficult… But after this, things are going to pick up drama-wise, although I don't know if it'll be done by Christmas. I don't know if I got it completely, but I'm pretty happy with it. Oh, and terrible Twilight reference, which I don't own. Enjoy!**

"Star?"

Star's gaze flicked up to meet Marco's. She had been zoned out, thinking about her predicament without paying attention to the conversation. It felt like she'd been standing there for a million hours.

Jackie had stayed past breakfast and joined in baking cookies with the Diaz family. Cooking, Star was reminded with a pang, was something usually reserved for herself and Marco, but it seemed that that unspoken rule had changed. They were currently all on the couch, eating the cookies and watching _Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer_ with hilarious commentary from everyone.

Except Star. She was standing awkwardly, having declined to sit, not touching the cookies and paying no attention to the movie, much less the "hilarious commentary."

Now she looked up at her name. Marco was staring at her with a confused expression.

"Star," he said again. "Aren't you going to say goodbye to Jackie?"

Star realized too late that the movie had ended and "Jackie" was standing, wearing a coat.

"Oh," she said, then forced a cheerful smile to her face. "Bye, Jackie!"

Marco's gaze lingered on Star for a moment, and she panicked. Did he notice something was up? Did he _know_? She couldn't look into those eyes, not now, _especially_ not now.

"Bye, Star. Bye, Marco." Jackie gave an easy smile, waving as she went out the door. Marco finally (finally!) looked away from Star to watch his girlfriend leave.

"Bye, Jackie!"

He sounded in love. Star lowered her eyes, feeling them burn with tears.

"Marco," Mrs. Diaz said once Jackie had gone. She and Mr. Diaz were still eating cookies, even after closing the door behind Jackie. "Your Uncle Ubaldo is coming for Christmas dinner tonight. We forgot to tell you earlier."

Marco spun around, eyes going wide. "Really?" When his parents nodded, he grinned.

Uncle Ubaldo was his favorite uncle. He was always talking about the things he did on his travels and buying souvenirs in exotic places to show Marco.

Turning to face Star, he began to think of all the fun they were going to have with his exciting relative. "Star –"

The blonde princess's expression made him pause. Something about it was off; something had been off the whole morning. He wanted to ask if she needed to talk, but when she spoke she sounded just like normal.

"He sounds great! I can't wait to meet him!" she chirped. "If it's okay, I'm gonna go call Pony Head and wish her merry Christmas, or however you say it, okay? Okay. Bye!"

Before he could get in a word edgewise, she bolted.

"Is it just me, or is Star acting weird?" Marco asked in the silence that followed.

His parents didn't answer. He looked to them and found that they had finished all of the cookies and were now struggling to eject the movie cassette from the DVR.

Star Butterfly slammed her bedroom door and face-planted onto her bed. After screaming into her pillow for a while, she stumbled in front of her mirror.

She hadn't been lying when she'd said she was going to call Pony Head, although everything she'd said felt like a lie. She had nothing better to do with her time – she couldn't possibly talk to Marco, Glossaryck was gone, and she doubted Janna wanted to talk about something so mundane.

It was strange. Serious romance was an entirely new feeling for her. She'd really only dated for the thrill of it, or to get back at her mother, or because her crush's eyes and bad boy attitude reminded her of Mewman heartthrob Cedward Ullin. This was different.

Marco was her friend, first and foremost. Star would support him, regardless of whom he dated. But it was tearing her up inside.

"Call… call Pony Head," she whispered, voice breaking. What else could she do?

The call went through, and a moment later, the flying unicorn princess who was having the time of her life at the Bounce Lounge appeared in the mirror.

"Hey, B-Fly! What's u-"

Pony Head noticed the tears in Star's eyes at once. "B-Fly?"

"C-can we talk?"

Pony Head might have been a bit wild, but she was a good friend at heart. She immediately retreated to the quietest corner of the cloudy dimension and gave Star a no-nonsense look.

"What happened? Is the Earth Turd okay?" Despite the nickname, her tone betrayed her worry.

"What? Oh, yeah, of course!" Star said, but her friend could see that something related to the human was bothering her.

Pony Head's eyes scanned Star's face anxiously. "C'mon, what happened?"

Star twisted her hands in front of her. Dropping all attempts to beat around the bush, she said, "Marco got Jackie Lynn Thomas to be his girlfriend."

"The chill one?" Pony Head asked, and Star gave a stiff nod. "Wow, B-Fly! Marco really won the lottery with that girl, huh?"

Star didn't answer, and the gleam disappeared from the equine princess's eyes.

Pony Head considered herself to be a master of romance and handsome hunks. She'd spent half her friendship with Star giving relationship advice, and half her life breaking up with various boyfriends. Her whole mission in everything she did, which was to live on the wild side, extended to all aspects of life. Romance was no exception.

So of course she realized immediately what was wrong with her friend. That didn't mean it was any less gobsmacking.

"Woah, woah, woah; hold the phone!" Pony Head's eyes widened to comical proportions. "For real? You… _like_ the Earth Turd?"

Star was fidgeting even more now, but at this, she pulled at her hair and made a noise in the back of her throat. "I don't know! I didn't think of him at all in that way before he got together with Jackie, at least I don't think so, but maybe I did? And when I saw the two of them together, I felt really weird, and it stunk, and then I thought about it afterward and I realized… that I really like him in a way I've never liked anyone before!"

"Slow down, bestie!" Pony Head exclaimed, alarmed. This was a side of Star she'd never seen before, and she wasn't sure what to do. "Marco doesn't know?"

Star moaned and dragged a hand down her face, giving Pony Head all the confirmation she needed.

This was unusual. Never had she thought Star had any romantic feelings for Marco. Pony Head wasn't sure if she should be mad at the Earth boy for dating another girl, or relieved since that meant she herself wasn't competing against him to be Star's BFF anymore.

She settled on outrage. "B-Fly, you gotta do something about this! Marco's stupid for not noticing you. Show him and that Jackie girl who's boss!"

Star shook her head in a panic, looking around frantically. "Keep it down!" She wasn't sure if Marco could hear her from the living room or not but didn't want to take chances.

"Okay," Pony Head said, uncharacteristically lowering her voice. "But you have to do something."

"No, I don't," Star responded miserably. "I can't. Jackie Lynn is so nice…"

And she couldn't do anything to wreck Marco's relationship. He was so happy, and _she was the reason_ he and Jackie were together. She couldn't sabotage that, despite how badly she wanted to.

And that was the problem. She wanted to do it. She wanted to listen to Pony Head and do something to get at Jackie. She was so lonely and wanted Marco so badly that she was willing to do something terrible to have him to herself. But he was her friend, not something to be fought over. And she hated herself for even being tempted.

"I don't know what to do," she sighed, letting her shoulders droop. Once again, water blurred the corners of her vision, and she wondered if it was possible to run out of tears.

"Star," Pony Head said softly, floating closer in the mirror. The blonde princess looked up, expression bleak.

"You want to know what to do? Let things run their course. If I know Marco, he'll be running to you when that Jackie girl breaks his heart. And if he don't see how awesome you are… I know where that Earth Turd lives."

Star gave a small small smile, eyes brightening, yet she felt far from happy. Pony Head's words hadn't cheered her up as much as she'd wanted, but it was a step in the right direction.

"Well, I have to go; Marco wants me to meet his uncle later… Oh, and merry Christmas!" Star added.

Her friend scrunched up her nose. "What's that?"

"It's like Mewmas, only with pretty lights, and without burning ancient sorcerers."

"Got it, B-Fly. You, too."

With that, Star ended the call, leaving Pony Head wondering if she'd imagined Star's heartache.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: An update! It's a Christmas miracle! Very difficult chapter, by the way. And I do not speak Swahili. (And yes, Mewmas is very cultish.)**

Marco's uncle, the man from whom he had inherited his middle name, arrived at sunset on Christmas Eve.

" _Hola_ , Marco!" Uncle Ubaldo exclaimed when Marco threw open the door. "How've you been?"

" _Great_!" Marco practically squealed, hugging him with enthusiasm. "You're here, you're here, you're here! Do you have any new stories? Where did you go this year? The Amazon? The Sahara desert? Egypt?"

"Arizona," Ubaldo answered.

Marco blinked. "Oh. Well, as long as you have stories."

The two of them entered the kitchen and talked with Marco's parents. Marco wished Star would come down from her bedroom and join them, but he'd heard her yelling only moments before, seeming to be having a very heated conversation with Pony Head.

Something was up with Star. To be honest, he was worried. She was spending less time around others, acting quieter and more subdued, and she hadn't been her usual self since Ludo's attack at the clown seance. He knew losing her spellbook was taking its toll on her, but this was unheard of; when had his friend ever not gotten excited over a celebration?

Marco hadn't expected her to spend her first Christmas on Earth feeling so down. He had wanted to take her to meet Santa in the mall and watch her wait anxiously for the next day, when there would be presents under the tree. But she didn't seem interested.

It wasn't that she moped around. No, she was still peppy and smiling, only less so. But there were times when her voice seemed off, or when her smile dropped when Marco was only paying a bit of attention. Like what had happened that morning. To him, that was the most concerning thing of all.

He wanted to help her. He was there for her. But every time he asked, she said she was fine and changed the subject.

And to top it all off, it was his fault for losing Glossaryck. But he couldn't have just let her fall into the portal, so he hoped she wasn't mad at him because he was never going to regret his decision.

What could he do?

"Marco, I haven't heard you say a word about the foreign exchange student living with you; where is she?"

Startled by the relevance of the question, Marco took a moment to respond. "Uh, her name's Star Butterfly. She's upstairs making a – phone call."

What else could he say? _Her name is Star Butterfly, princess of Mewni, which is a planet in another dimension, and she spends her free time mowing down monsters with a unicorn-powered wand?_ That only worked for native Echo Creek residents, for some reason.

"Marco, why don't you go up and get her? Christmas Eve dinner's almost ready," his mother said, cutting off his over-thinking mind.

Oh. "Got it," Marco said, bounding upstairs.

He hesitated outside his best friend's room, though. She might not have been done with her mirror call, which he didn't want to interrupt.

"Star?" he called, knocking lightly with his ear against the door. There was no answer, and no noise at all, which he took as a sign that she was no longer talking to Pony Head.

Gently easing the door open, he found her lying flat on her bed, staring at the ceiling. Marco was troubled at seeing Star in such a state.

"Oh… hi, Marco," she said slowly, not taking her eyes off the ceiling. She looked spaced-out.

"Star," Marco said again, walking cautiously to her side, "are you okay?"

 _No_ , she thought to herself, but aloud said, "Yep."

Marco stood over her, wondering why he hadn't noticed earlier the extent of whatever was going on. This was definitely not normal for Star.

He wanted to comfort her and tell her they would get Glossaryck back eventually, but he had been trying that for weeks. It wasn't working, and he couldn't think of anything else to say that would make her forget about her spellbook.

When she didn't say anything else, Marco sighed. He could talk to her later about this. For now, though, he just wanted them to be able to get through Christmas.

"Dinner's ready" was all he could think of to say.

Star pushed herself off the bed and walked slowly to the door, seeming as though her feet were having difficulty moving. Her eyes were unfocused when she replied, "Okay," and went around him to leave the room.

Marco caught her by the shoulders before she left.

"Star?" he said, searching her eyes and trying to get them to meet his. "Are you _sure_ you're okay?"

Star hesitated. Her mind went to her conversation with Pony Head, which she had been debating for what felt like hours. _Let things run their course_ , her friend had said. Star couldn't say anything about this to Marco. No matter how he pleaded with her.

"Yep," she repeated, forcing a now-familiar, falsely carefree tone. "C'mon! I can't _wait_ to meet your _uuuuncle_!"

Bounding ahead of Marco, she hopped down the stairs, determined to keep up the charade until Christmas was over. It helped that Jackie Lynn Thomas wasn't anywhere near. Star immediately felt guilty for that thought, however true it might have been.

Marco followed her down the stairs, attempting to push his worry to the back of his mind.

As they sat down for Christmas Eve dinner, he decided to introduce her to Ubaldo. "Uncle Ubaldo, this is Star. Star, this is my uncle."

" _Hodi_. Nice to meet you, Star," Ubaldo said, smiling.

"You, too!" Star chirped, sliding into her seat. Inwardly, she wondered if anyone would notice if she moved her food around the plate but didn't eat it.

Marco had expected Star to ask what _hodi_ meant, but when she didn't, he pushed down his disappointment and asked for his own benefit.

"It means _hello_ in Swahili," Ubaldo explained to him. As a part of his travels, Ubaldo had picked up seven languages and counting. It was just another thing Marco thought was awesome, but Star didn't seem to be listening.

Eventually, the dinner conversation switched to school, then how Alfonso and Fergeson were doing, and finally, Marco's new girlfriend.

Marco was super excited to tell his uncle about Jackie. Ubaldo hearing about the news was something he'd been itching to happen ever since they had gotten together. His uncle knew everything about her from what Marco had told him, and at last Marco was going to be able to tell him the about their new status!

He began to talk about her, telling Ubaldo about their first kiss, their many dates, and the movie they had watched with his parents that morning. His uncle looked incredibly proud, paying rapt attention.

Until the end, however. Nearing the final part of Marco's story, Ubaldo's eyes slid to the left, where the blonde girl was sitting tensely. He knew nothing about her, but he was a smart man, and he recognized that the girl was not happy with the retelling.

Her eyes were wet, and her hands twisted in her lap. Her eyebrows were drawn together and she bit her lip in a way that suggested she was trying not to show pain.

Ubaldo could draw many conclusions from this behavior, but he was Rafael's brother at heart, and he was most interested by the possibility that this girl was jealous.

"My boy," he said, interrupting Marco's story, "that's wonderful! It sounds like you've found a keeper!"

"I know, right?" Marco enthused. "She's great!"

Ubaldo watched Star throughout this exchange. She seemed to sink farther into her chair and her misery. It was definitely jealousy, although whether it was platonic remained to be seen.

"So, tell me more about what you two do for fun," Marco's uncle said, gesturing at Star and Marco.

Marco answered for both of them, shooting his best friend a worried look. "Well, we hang out, and we kind of explore, I guess. Right, Star?"

He slung a friendly arm around the girl, and Ubaldo found proof at last; at the contact, her cheeks, which each had a heart on it for some reason, went slightly darker in color. She was romantically jealous, all right. And Marco didn't seem to know.

Ubaldo, being the guy he was, decided to tip his nephew off. As dinner was ending and he left his present for Marco under the tree before he had to leave, he pulled Marco aside.

" _Joyeux Noël_ , Marco," he said in French. "And about Star…"

Marco looked up at his favorite uncle with confusion. Star was still at the table, having decided to help Mr. and Mrs. Diaz wash dishes. He wasn't sure what Ubaldo could have to say about her – maybe he'd picked up on her mood. Marco sighed, preparing himself for the tedious task of explaining.

"Look, I know she's –"

"Marco, my boy, take a look at her. Jackie Lynn has competition. That girl, Star, likes you."


	4. Chapter 4

**Happy New Year! Thanks to all of you who reviewed so far! This chapter dives into uncharted territory, since there is no proof of how Star and Marco would react to this situation. Enjoy, hopefully.**

After Marco's uncle left, Star placed the last dish in the cupboard and politely excused herself to Mr. and Mrs. Diaz. The two of them let her go, sharing confused looks.

Star didn't want to spend another moment downstairs. She'd helped Marco's parents do the dishes out of courtesy, nothing more. How could she have thought she would have been able to get through dinner? They'd talked about Jackie. Marco's uncle had gone on and on about how _proud_ he was, how _happy_ their new relationship made him…

Everyone was so happy about it! Marco couldn't have been more excited! Star couldn't take that away from him!

She buried her face in her pillow. It was nighttime; she could console herself with that. She could spend the night in her room without Marco Diaz checking on her. Sure she could.

"Ughhhh," she moaned. When had life gotten so complicated?

Closing her eyes, she willed herself to sleep – without nightmares, of course. Though, with her luck, that hope was unlikely.

Meanwhile, Marco was standing before the front door of his house in shock.

 _She loves you._

He hadn't believed his uncle at first. He hadn't felt any surprise, only confusion and annoyance. Yeah, right, Star loved him, very funny; they were just friends. It wasn't debatable. Marco could say with absolute certainty that Star wasn't in love with him.

But his uncle was also certain. "Just look at her," he'd said. "She's jealous of your girlfriend. I've seen a lot in Arizona, my boy. She has feelings for you."

"But she helped me and Jackie get together," Marco had argued. The humor in this conversation was fading fast.

"Maybe she didn't know how she felt until later," Ubaldo had said with a shrug. "Or maybe her feelings changed. But you know her more than I do. See you next _Navidad_ , Marco!"

And then Uncle Ubaldo had left, leaving Marco suddenly remembering the sleepover incident.

People's feelings change. Hadn't Star said something similar to the Truth Cube?

Did she really have feelings for him?

Presently, Marco was standing in the foyer a full five minutes after his uncle had left, unable to string together enough thoughts to count as a reaction. But at the sound of Star stomping up the stairs to her room, he snapped out of his stupor enough to realize something.

Star _had_ been acting gloomier than usual, hadn't she? She hadn't recovered emotionally from losing Glossaryck, even after weeks had gone by. Marco had never realized something else could have been bothering her. He felt so stupid now.

But was jealousy the reason for Star Butterfly, ultimate Warnicorn tamer and nacho-eating bestie, being so downcast?

Marco didn't know. He could hardly grasp the concept. Sure, he trusted Ubaldo, but he and Star had never been anything more than friends. At the same time, he couldn't unsee the new possibility that his uncle had brought up.

But where was the proof? Marco had never seen any. So this was all a misunderstanding. Something was bothering Star, but she wasn't jealous of Jackie. Was she?

Marco groaned in frustration. There was only one way to solve this. He had to ask her. Then they could go back to being mopey friends.

He moved from his place at the door at last, striding purposefully upstairs to his best friend's room with this purpose in mind. He carefully phrased what he wanted to say in his head.

 _Star, there's something we need to talk about – my uncle noticed something –_

No, it was better to leave Ubaldo's strange romance-sensor out of this.

 _You've been acting weird whenever I mention Jackie –_

But bringing up Jackie would just make things all the more confusing. Marco liked Jackie, and he was incredibly happy to be with her, but what could he say to Star about that? If he was actually considering that Star liked him, he would also have to consider how he felt about her, and that was a whole new mind-blower.

"Keep it simple," Marco said to himself outside Star's door, squeezing his eyes shut tight. "Ask her if she feels okay. Find out what she thinks of me and Jackie. Ask her if she likes me."

 _Do I like her?_

 _We'll cross that bridge if we get there. Which we won't, because Star and I are just friends._

"Star and I are just friends," he said aloud, as if that would convince the fates. "She's not in love with me. I'll ask her, and she'll say she's not."

Unbeknownst to him, his best friend was standing wide-eyed on the other side of the door, hearing every word he said.

Marco knew.

Marco was going to ask because he knew.

How come he knew?

Star was thoroughly unprepared for when her friend mustered the courage to open the door, and suddenly the two were face to face.

"S-star?" Marco stammered, voice nearly squeaking.

She didn't know what to do. She'd heard him, and judging from his expression, he knew she'd heard him. Her emotions were scattered all over the place. She had no idea what do do.

"I'm sorry," she blurted.

Whatever Marco had been expecting her to say, that was not it. "Huh?"

"I'm sorry," she repeated. She was crying now – again – and Marco was worried. No matter how she felt about him, he didn't want her to be upset.

"I'm sorry, Marco – but –" Star hesitated, remembering how she was supposed to be waiting it out. But Pony Head hadn't told her what to do if Marco came asking if she was in love with him.

"Where did you hear that?" she asked instead.

"My uncle – he got it into his head that you have a crush on me." Marco tried to make it sound like it was totally ridiculous, but it was hard when Star was having such an extreme reaction to what he'd said on the other side of the door.

"Oh – ha, ha." Star took a moment to be angry at Marco's uncle as she wiped away her tears, but she was more upset at the unwanted attention from her friend than angry.

Marco frowned worriedly. "Star?"

The princess bit her lip and stared at the floor, knowing what was coming.

"… _Do_ you?"

"Do I what?" Star replied with faked levity, but her voice was too low-pitched, and Marco knew she was avoiding it.

"Have a crush on me," he prompted.

Star hesitated a bit too long, and right away she knew she wouldn't be able to lie. Not when he was directly asking her. Oh, this was going to wreck their relationship.

Marco stared at his best friend, unable to believe his eyes and ears. _Unbelievable_. Star… was basically saying she liked him. _Romantically_. He wasn't sure how he felt about that, but he was stunned. Then something else occurred to him.

She'd been lying about her feelings for an undetermined amount of time. Since when? And to what depth?

"Star? How long?" The question burst out before he could stop himself.

Star was shaking, eyes watering, and she flinched away when Marco tried to move closer. This was not happening. They were supposed to be best friends, not part of a love triangle. It was all her fault for developing feelings for Marco.

She shook her head, fists clenched. It was probably lucky that she was not holding her wand.

"Marco…" She refused to make eye contact.

"Star," he responded, mind spinning with a hundred questions.

Star hugged herself, backing up as Marco tried to come closer again. She bumped against her bed and let herself slide down its side.

"How – how long, Star?" Marco asked again quietly.

Star buried her head in her arms, giving up on controlling her tears. Marco knelt down across from her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

She had to answer. He already knew, so it wasn't like she had a reason to keep it from him any longer.

Her voice was choked and raw when she whispered, "I don't know."

Marco was confused, but he struggled to hold onto his calm appearance. He pushed down the conglomeration of different emotions he was feeling and focused on trying to get his friend to meet his eyes.

 _She doesn't think of you as a friend anymore. She's in love with you_.

He ignored this voice and the blush that threatened to cross his cheeks. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know when… things changed." She lifted her head but kept her eyes trained on the floor. Her voice was louder now, but it was still devoid of the swooping tones that made her Star.

"I mean, I think it… started… when you went to the dance with Jackie, but it could have been before then, and I know I wasn't sure for a long time, but I never thought I was in – I felt like that until the dance. Before that, I don't know! I thought we were besties, but I had this weird feeling" – she'd written about it in her diary – "that I didn't understand!"

Her voice was growing in strength and volume. "But now I do understand, and I wish I didn't, because it hurts!"

She pulled at her hair, shaking and out of tears, to illustrate her point, realizing the expression on Marco's face too late.

He was shocked (mostly because her words hadn't made a bit of sense). Puzzling out the meaning behind her rant, he came to the uncomfortable truth that Star had been suffering for weeks now. And it was because of him.

That wasn't all. Their friendly dynamic was gone. There was no getting it back. She was in love with him, but he already had a girlfriend.

Besides, he and Star, a couple? Marco was sure he'd do something stupid, and then not only would they not be a couple, but they wouldn't even be friends anymore. It was a strange realization, but he actually had less to lose with dating Jackie.

 _Less to lose with dating Jackie_.

Marco felt as though he'd been punched in the stomach.

He felt _disappointed_ over his logic being impenetrable.

Why was that?

Didn't he want to be with Jackie?

"Marco?" Star said, absolutely terrified. She'd ruined their friendship. He didn't want anything to do with her. Why should he? She was a jealous liar with a horrible understanding of her own feelings. Was that harsh? No, because it was true, and he was mad at her.

"I'm sorry. I should – I should leave," she whispered, but before she could move, she was engulfed in a hug.

It was a hug unlike any of those before it, filled with knowledge and questions and the realization that they would never be the same.

"Star," Marco said, moving to sit next to her. He didn't let her out of his embrace. "It's okay. We're still best friends." Although he wasn't sure why she would fall for him, of all people. "I'll always be here for you, you know that? Jackie might be my girlfriend, but you're my best friend. I care about you."

And it seemed he loved her. But then there was Jackie, with whom it was much easier to be in love. And there was so much to lose if he loved Star. But all the same, he found his emotions being more confused than ever before.

"Thanks," Star said softly, surprised. Her heart warmed, but she knew it wasn't enough. The ache was still there. She knew he didn't reciprocate her feelings and was just trying to let her down easy. It hurt even more than jealousy.

 _I think I love her_ , Marco realized as he hugged her. _Uh-oh_.

 _Why did I have to tell him I love him?_ Star wondered in anguish.

At the same time, both wished for life to go back to the way it was before the school dance.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: A chapter at last! Here we have Pony Head making a potentially catastrophic decision (and advancing the plot, because I bribed her.)**

Jackie was just preparing herself for bed when she received a very unexpected visitor.

She had been about to brush her teeth, already in her ocean-themed pajamas, when someone or something began to insistently tap at her window.

This was unusual, but since it was the Most Magical Time of the Year, Jackie was not startled. To be fair, though, she seldom showed it when she was.

Setting her toothbrush on the counter, she strode to her bedroom window and peered out.

"…Hello?" she called out cautiously.

The moonless night's shadows extended into the underbrush, preventing her from seeing whatever was outside, but she didn't miss the inhuman silhouette that rose from the darkness… and it was floating.

"Hey, girlfriend! Or should I say, _Earth Turd's_ girlfriend!"

Jackie's confusion melted into surprise, then back into confusion when she wondered what Flying Princess Pony Head was doing at her house at 10:00 PM on Christmas Eve.

"Hey," she said, opening the window and allowing the equine princess room to enter. Pony Head zipped inside, casting her gaze around the room.

"Niiiice place!" she said, sounding genuinely impressed. Jackie didn't know her that well, but she seemed like the type to not be impressed easily.

"Um… what are you doing here?" It was the obvious question.

Pony Head's smile slid off her face. Hovering in place, she seemed conflicted, or perhaps afraid, eyes darting left and right.

"Listen, you seem chill, girl," she said at last, "so you better promise not to freak."

Jackie considered herself to be pretty skilled at controlling her emotions, but now she was worried. All the same, she responded, "Okay. I promise."

Pony Head leveled her gaze at her. "Good. We gotta talk."

.*.*.*.

Jackie really did think she was good at controlling her emotions. She had been sad when her grandmother died, but she hadn't cried. She'd been surprised and a little upset when Marco had broken her skateboard, but she never held it against him; besides, she'd bought a new one the next day. She had been absolutely disgusted by Star's brownies, but to be fair, the girl was a disaster in the kitchen, and even StarFan13 hadn't liked them. Jackie hadn't even wanted to insult them, but the Truth Cube had left her no choice.

But none of these instances prepared her for what Pony Head had to say.

The unicorn princess left after a long, heartfelt, emotional conversation. They had agreed on what to do, but Jackie was still left feeling shell shocked and drained.

She hadn't expected this.

In hindsight, though, she should have. Star and Marco were always practically attached at the hip. Hundreds of people at school thought they should have gotten together. Heck, even Brittney Wong thought they belonged with each other. (Jackie had overheard her in the girls' bathroom once, telling her friends not to say a word.)

But to know that Star actually had a crush on Marco – Jackie's _boyfriend_ – was surprising even after all of that.

Jackie tore her eyes away from the window, realizing that she'd been standing in the same place for at least two minutes after Pony Head had left.

She wasn't mad at Star. No, a person couldn't help whom they liked. But she wasn't completely okay with this either.

Maybe a small part of her believed that Star was more in love with Marco than she was.

Jackie frowned. Could that be true? She hadn't searched her feelings thoroughly enough, but anyway, it wasn't up to her.

Turning to her nightstand, she picked up her phone, recalling the course of action a reluctant Pony Head had agreed to.

 _To solve a problem, one must communicate with all those involved._

Jackie typed in the number and hit dial.

On the other side of Echo Creek, Star and Marco were startled out of their embrace by a phone ringing.

"I – I better get that," Marco said, wincing at the sudden awkwardness. He backed out of the hug to reach into his pocket and answer his cellphone.

Star watched him nervously, wondering if getting a phone call meant that the moment was over.

 _It's probably Grandma,_ Marco thought, until he saw the caller ID. Immediately, his heart dropped into the pit of his stomach.

No, no, no, no, no. Why did it have to be Jackie? Why did she have to call now?

"Uh – heyyy," he said, answering. What else could he have done, let it go to voicemail? Star would've asked who it was who'd called, and Jackie would have probably tried calling again. No, he didn't want to deal with that so soon.

But he was quickly regretting his split-second decision. He was finding it impossible to keep cool, and Star was looking at him worriedly.

What do I do, what do I do, what do I do?

"Hey, Marco," Jackie said, sounding like she either didn't notice his nervousness or didn't care.

"Why – why are you calling?" Marco stammered, trying to sound carefree, like he wasn't accusing her. He wanted to add "this late out," but he didn't want to tip Star off to the fact that it was Jackie calling. The fewer words said, the better.

But then Jackie said something he wasn't expecting.

"Can you put Star on?"

Marco froze, unable to believe his terrible luck. The situation couldn't possibly get any more awkward.

"Uh, actually, she's kind of busy –"

"It's important," Jackie interrupted.

He hadn't noticed at first, too worried about Star, but Jackie didn't sound as laid-back as usual. In fact, she sounded downright stressed.

"Are you okay?" he asked, lowering his voice in concern.

"Yeah," his girlfriend replied. "I just need to talk to Star."

At 11:00 at night? Marco's nervousness deepened as he worried over what she wanted to talk about.

But he didn't see what else he could do. Making eye contact with his anxious friend, he said, "It's for you, Star."

Star had been having an inner freak-out session during the entire phone conversation. She was trying to school her facial expression into one of calmness and mild interest, but worries crowded her mind while she had no one to talk to.

 _Marco likes Jackie more than me. He doesn't hate me, but he doesn't_ like _like me. Wow, Star, great time to notice how cute he is when he's nervous. Who's he on the phone with? Please don't be –_

And that was when Marco gave the phone to her.

"Hi?" she said into the Earth cellphone. Right away, her mood soured at the voice on the other end. Marco saw her reaction and winced.

"Star, I think we need to talk," Jackie said, matter-of-fact.

"A-about what?" Star responded, trying to remember how to act natural while her mind filled with horrible possibilities about what Jackie wanted to talk about, which she firmly pushed down.

"Your feelings for Marco."

For all her worrying, Star did a double take on actually hearing this, not believing what her brain was telling her Jackie had said. "Huh?"

"Star… I know how you feel about Marco." Jackie said it delicately and compassionately, but that failed to register.

Star must have gone pale, because Marco put a hand on her shoulder. She felt icy cold and burning hot at the same time.

"What do you mean? I don't –" Star stammered, trying to muster a laugh, but the pressure from the past few hours had drained her too much. She broke off, trying to finish her sentence but unable to find the energy.

"It's kind of obvious," Jackie said quietly.

"No it isn't!" Star snapped before realizing she'd just confirmed it. Marco took her hand (in a totally platonic way, she reminded herself sadly), and she realized that he was afraid that she and Jackie were going to fight.

Star swallowed and sent him a weak smile that told him everything was okay. _But it's not._

"Star, it's fine; I'm not mad. But you need to tell Marco," Jackie said consolingly.

"Uhhh," the princess drew out, reluctant to continue talking because of her dislike for Jackie and the fact that Marco was right in front of her. "He kinda knows already."

Interest piqued, Marco asked, "Who knows what?"

Star turned red but answered his question, pointing at him. It took mere seconds for him to jump to the right conclusion about what was being discussed.

"How does she know?" he yelped in a harsh whisper, but Star couldn't answer while listening to Jackie at the same time.

"Really?" Jackie sounded mildly surprised.

 _Which for her is flabbergasted_ , Star thought uncharitably, then immediately felt bad.

 _It's not her fault she's perfect_.

"Yeah…" She didn't want to get into the details. "Is that all you wanted?"

"Actually, this makes things easier. Can you put Marco back on?"

Star looked at her best friend, quelling her panic. "Jackie wants to talk to you."

Marco took the phone from her. She shoved it at him like it was a live snake.

He gingerly held to phone to his ear.

"Jackie?"

"Hey…" Jackie said on the other end. "Listen, Marco. I'm not going to be offended or anything, but I need to know what you want."

Marco blinked. "What do you –"

"It's your decision."

There was a rush of static as Jackie sighed. Her next words were just as calm as ever.

"Who would you rather be with?"

 **A/N: Let me know what you want to happen next!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: This is the last chapter, which I was supposed to finish before Starbruary started. Before you continue, I'd like to say that there are a million ways this plot could have progressed, and truthfully I would like it in canon to be much longer than what I've written here. I'm excited to see what the Svtfoe team decides to do. Enjoy the conclusion to "Christmas Woes"!**

Marco stared ahead in shock.

Unfortunately, "ahead" was where Star was sitting, and her panicked expression did nothing to help his own panic.

"Could you – could you repeat that?" he managed at last into the phone.

He hoped Jackie didn't mean what he thought she meant. He prayed it was a joke or a misunderstanding, or that she would take it back.

"Which one of us do you enjoy spending more time with?" the girl on the other end of the phone asked with barely a hitch in her voice. "I don't want this to turn into something… you know, dramatic. It's your decision, Marco."

"I – " he cut himself off, mind whirling, suddenly feeling sick.

He couldn't be asked to make such a huge decision. He didn't even understand his own feelings! How was he supposed to decide his future, let alone determine which amazing girl would spend the rest of the night and possibly her life miserable and hating him? Was that too strong? No, because what if that was what would happen? How could he choose between them?

It really hit him then: he was being _fought_ over. The thought was thrilling, before he reminded himself that it was the girl of his dreams and his best friend who were fighting.

But he couldn't choose between Jackie and Star. Jackie didn't deserve to be rejected. And there was no way he would hurt Star, especially not now that he knew how she felt. How was he supposed to mend their friendship?

This terrified him perhaps more than making a decision. He couldn't lose Star. He would never do anything to jeopardize their friendship.

That made things suddenly much clearer.

"Jackie –"

"You don't have to decide anything now," she said. "It can wait, if Star's okay with that. Just think on it."

" – I think we should break up."

"…Oh." Jackie paused. "Sure."

Marco cast his eyes downward, wishing she wouldn't sound so accepting. "I can't make a decision yet, but I need to do this. I hope we can still be friends. You're really cool, and I'm sorry."

Jackie gave a little laugh. "Marco, of course we'll still be friends. For the record, I think you're cool, too."

"…Thanks." He put as much earnestness and emotion as he could muster into that word.

Regardless of their relationship, Marco was so incredibly lucky to know Jackie. Maybe one day they'd be together again, but maybe not.

Star was giving Marco a bug-eyed look, seriously considering shaking him until he explained what was going on.

 _He. Broke. Up. With. Jackie_.

She was desperately trying not to hope that this meant what she thought it meant. Scarcely breathing, she tried not to think at all, not to get her hopes up. Marco was no longer with Jackie Lynn Thomas. He'd broken up with her. _Jackie_.

Jackie, his lifelong crush. Star felt a pang of guilt. She herself was the reason he'd done this, wasn't she?

Marco looked downright dejected when he said goodbye and ended the phone call. Of course Star was the reason he'd done it. She felt awful.

 _He probably hates me now, or at least Jackie does, and I deserve it._

Marco put away his phone, staring hollowly at the wall. Star was afraid of what he would say, but she mustered the courage to ask.

"Why did you do that?"

Marco didn't react for a moment. Finally, he turned to her. Star felt as though her heart had stopped.

"I had to," he said simply. He didn't sound mad. "I had to choose. Even if I didn't… break up with her now, I would have had to do something about… this… eventually."

"So… you chose…" Star left her sentence unfinished, unable to let herself believe it. Not unless he said it himself.

Marco let out a long sigh. "I didn't," he said. "I can't. I don't know how I feel, but I can't be in a relationship with her until I know."

"Oh." Star was ashamed at feeling disappointed that he hadn't done it to be with her. All she wanted – all she _should've_ wanted – was for Marco to be happy. And she'd ruined everything for him.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, so quietly she was sure he hadn't heard her, but his head snapped up in surprise.

"Why?"

She sighed. For the sake of their friendship, she decided to tell him exactly how she was feeling.

"I've been so selfish, and so jealous of Jackie. I'm sorry that I'm the reason you broke up with her. I'm…" she choked on her words but pushed onward. "I'm a bad friend."

Marco was stunned. " _You're_ a bad friend?" he repeated incredulously. "I'm the one who didn't notice how you felt. I'm the one who has no idea what decision to make, when I know I could never do anything to hurt you. Star, if anyone's a bad friend, it's me."

Star looked at him in awe, tears blurring her vision. (Was she never going to stop crying?)

"You're the best-est friend I could ever have," she said, hugging him as hard as she could.

Marco smiled, but it was a bittersweet smile. He was keenly aware of her embrace, proving once again that their friendship had changed forever.

He didn't know whom he was meant to be with, but he would never leave Star's side.

Star didn't know what would happen down the line, but she would never stop loving Marco.

Even if they were just friends. Even if he didn't want to be with her. There were no more barriers between them, really. Being his friend would always come first, no matter how much more he was to her.

Suddenly, Marco's phone buzzed. The two of them shared apprehensive looks before Marco retrieved it from his pocket.

Immediately, his face broke into a smile, and he laughed. He showed her the screen, which had a line of four numbers on it.

"Star, it's midnight. That makes it Christmas Day."

Star had forgotten all about the Earth holiday. It took her a moment to process the abrupt change of gears. "It is?"

"Yeah," Marco said. "Do you want to go downstairs and celebrate?"

Star hesitated, then raised an eyebrow. "Celebrate how?"

"How about movies and my special, once-in-a-lifetime Christmas Nachos?" he replied with a smile, helping her up from the floor.

She dusted off her dress and returned his smile. "I'd like that." Together, they exited her room, heading downstairs.

Star smiled to herself. Who knew what the future would hold? Right now, she was just glad to be with Marco. Sure, he had pretty much turned her down. But he'd said it himself; he didn't know how he felt. There was hope.

Until then, she was content to be his best friend.


End file.
